The Kenyan Demon Debate

A remote Kikuyu village in Kenya have been in uproar recently over a neighbouring village’s claims that their livestock is possessed by demons with telepathic abilities. This flood of worry has coincided with a new technological initiative in the village, which has seen the installation of a telephone mast, and has provided each adult in Read More

The Paint Mixer’s Son

Hugh Jay was the best in the paint mixing business, and his popularity boomed following the release of his latest series of paint colours. Hugh had created a series of bird-and-nature-themed hues and tones, which included ‘Wren’s Dawn’, ‘Owl’s Moon’, ‘Robin’s Eve’ and ‘Jay’s Sun’, and they were possibly the most successful line he had Read More

Clever Peter

In 2010 the UWE Drama Society took Grimm Fairy Tales to the Edinburgh Fringe that we adapted ourselves. I loved the silly little story of Clever Hans and decided to give it a darker ending.     Props – Ice Cream, iPod, Cigar, Cheque, Magic Beans, Wine Bottles, Suitcase. PETER – A selfish idiot, 15 AMY Read More

Hunt

16:07 Perdita held her mother’s hand, awkwardly through the thick gloves, but tight. The eye-holes above her snout restricted her view, so she relied on her mother to guide her safely. This year she was a werewolf. The cul de sac was infested with all manner of ghouls, grotesques, and ghastlies, all milling this way Read More

Sim ill arse hounds

Another Creative Writing challenge was to produce something where the first line was the same as the last line. Inspired by nonsense poems, I tried to create a series of near-limericks that have the same first and last lines – but also, these repeated lines sound almost identical to the next poem’s first and last Read More

The Worst Tribute of All Time

If you haven’t yet caught the incredible Worst Idea of All Time podcast by Tim Batt and Guy Montgomery (on the http://www.littleempirepodcast.com/ network) then you’d better drop whatever it is you’re doing and give it a listen now! It’s some of the funniest spontaneous content on the web, and true gold comedy. Long story short, I sent Read More

Perspectives

Another Creative Writing group prompt – we had to write 500 words and tell the story from two perspectives. You’ll notice the occisional # – when you’re done reading, scroll to the bottom for instructions, then read again!     Perspective 1 Twenty three hours. Used, neglected, forgotten, alone. # Munshifa was left splayed across Read More

Joe Chicago in the Angel’s Brothel

I was overjoyed when given the task to write up to 500 words that connect to the words Flight, Angel and Tentacle. This small excercise conjured the memory of a pulp sci fi detective chapter I’d written a couple of years back (Joe Chicago and the Case of the Fallen Angel – http://montyake.pirat.uk/?p=47), and made Read More

Molar

With the Creative Writing club at work, our week’s assignment was to produce written work of around 500 words relating to any 5-letter-word starting with “M”. I laughed off someone’s suggestion of “Monty” whilst debating the merits of writing a short essay on how great I am. Then I went to the Dentist, and came up with Read More

Wichtlein Nix

The captain ordered the drawbridge lowered for the fourth time that night. The men obeyed. As the portcullis lifted, he took a torch from the wall; the same he had carried out with him throughout the night. The cloth of the grip was damp with the sweat of its last use. As he carried it Read More

Poetic Feet & Meter

The answer is that I try to construct such poetry whilst strictly obeying my chosen syllabic foot and line meter. What does this mean? Well, my latest embarrassment of a business card was created with the hopes that more people will be able to identify these poetic constructions, and try sticking to them when they Read More

Fratrisidled

He rode a metronome, a-saddled high, burdened with lead, Weeks a-rode from home, September sky unpleasant red, His head a heavy tome, a desp’rate guy in want of bed, A dirt encrusted dome, black-dripping eye, and close to dead. His hoss, a steady mare, relentless marching in its sway, A’course, not heard no-where neither a Read More

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